Thoughts from the abyss

2003-05-08T11:33:00.000-04:00

I am the son of the son of Krum! All fear me and bow to my fearsome visage! =P

2003-05-06T08:43:00.000-04:00

Hey Mr. Tryde !

2003-04-29T21:15:00.000-04:00

French Guard
I'm French! Why do think I have this outrageous
accent, you silly king-a?!

What Monty Python Character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-03-09T22:49:00.000-05:00

quote of the week:

In response to Bush's comment during his Thursday night press conference that he prays for wisdom and strength
Me: The strongest proof thus far there is no God, Bush prays for wisdom

2003-03-07T15:37:00.000-05:00

Apparently I am a fascist. How pleasant.

Fascist - You believe that an alliance of
monopolistic corporations and oppressive
government should cooperate to lord it over the
population with an efficient iron fist. Your
historical role model is Adolf Hitler.

Which political sterotype are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-02-27T22:42:00.000-05:00

I'm a Philosopher/Scientist!

Which Enemy of the Christian Church Are You?

Take More of Robert & Tim's Quizzes
Watch Robert & Tim's Cartoons

You are Elizabeth Bathory. (The bloodcountess)
Legend tells us that you, this very rich,
beautiful and high born woman tortured and
murdered some 650 young women and bathed in
their warm blood to keep yourself beautiful.
In some stories, it is said you have drank thier
blood as well. You were a sexual sadist on a
grand scale.
Ah vanity is your downfall. For shame!

Which Imfamous criminal are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-02-16T22:36:00.000-05:00

You think you're deep, tortured and misunderstood.
You're not, you're just incoherent and a bit
silly. Now you know.

What Lord of the Rings engrish subtitle are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-02-12T22:02:00.000-05:00

questionaire taken from Shauna's blog...
* Book you keep meaning to read that always gets bumped to second place by new purchases: I've had a true crime book, House of Secrets, kicking around for a while. I just keep getting sucked into these long historical works

* Book you put down halfway through and never got back to: Mein Kamph (sp?) I didn't make it far at all, you'd think someone with Hitler's renowned oratory skills would be a good writer. Alas, it's rather bad

* Book you love and can never convince anyone else to read: I don't even try to recommend most of the books I read as I know none of my friends will find them interesting

* Book you'll never read no matter how many people tell you you should: At the moment, the Harry Potter books. I am not saying never, just not for a long time. maybe when all 7 are done. possibly

* Children's book that no-one else remembers except you: Umm...I read this book in 2nd grade, I don't remember the title, about a girl in a foster home and she was very bad at math. considering it was written in the 1920's and passed down to me through my grandmother I doubt it has many contemporary fans

* Children's book everyone seems to have read that you've never read / heard of: a lot of people I know seem to have read the Velventine Rabbit

* Book you loved on first reading which on subsequent readings wow, not so much: Little Women. I just think between book and movie I heard the darn story too many times and just got sort of burned out. Plus I was rather underwhelmed by Little Men

* Most Overrated / Overhyped Book or Author, in your opinion: I am willing to admit this opinion may be due to the fact I was only 10 when I read the book, but I wasn't too impressed with The Hunchback of Notre Dame

* Most Underrated / Misunderstood Book or Author, in your opinion: hard to say, I am hampered with this because I don't read much recreational fiction (I tend to stick to nonfiction mostly) the last fiction writer I've really latched onto (Dostoyevsky) is rather well regarded in literary circles. I'll update if I think of someone

2003-02-07T13:37:00.000-05:00

CENTER>

The haxor handle of Korey is "Deadly Haxxor".

for the record I don't even know what a haxor handle is

2003-01-23T13:45:00.000-05:00

stayed home from school today, bad cold progressed to the point where my sore throat renders me practically mute and I just can't stop coughing. Oh well. In awesome news, Pearl Jam announced their tour dates (finally lol)
April
1 Denver, CO Pepsi Center
3 Oklahoma City, OK Ford Center
5 San Antonio, TX Verizon Wireless Amph.
6 Houston, TX Cynthia Wood Mitchell Pav.
8 New Orleans, LA New Orleans Arena
9 Birmingham, AL Birmingham Jefferson Complex
11 W. Palm Bch. FL Coral Sky Amph.
13 Tampa, FL St. Pete Times Forum
15 Raleigh, NC Alltel Pavilion Walnut Creek
16 Charlotte, NC Verizon Wireless Amph.
18 Nashville, TN Am South Amph.
19 Atlanta, GA Hi Fi Buys Amph.
21 Lexington, KY Rupp Arena
22 St. Louis, MO Savvis Center
23 Champaign, IL Assembly Ctr.
25 Cleveland, OH Gund Arena
26 Pittsburgh, PA Mellon Arena
28 Philadelphia, PA First Union Spectrum Arena
29 Albany, NY Pepsi Center
30 Uniondale, NY Nassau Colliseum

May
2 Buffalo, NY HSBC Arena
3 State College, PA Bryce Jordan Ctr.

28 Missoula, MT Adams Fieldhouse
30 Vancouver, BC GM Place

June
1 San Francisco, CA Shoreline Amph.
2 Los Angeles, CA Verizon Wireless Amph.
5 San Diego, CA San Diego Sports Arena
6 Las Vegas, NV Mandalay Bay Events Ctr.
7 Phoenix, AZ Cricket Pavilion
9 Dallas, TX Smirnoff Music Ctr.
10 Little Rock, AR Alltel Arena
12 Kansas City, MO Verizon Wireless, Amph.
13 Council Bluff, IA Mid-America Ctr.
15 Fargo, ND Fargo Dome
16 St. Paul, MN Xcell Arena
18 Chicago, IL United Center
19 Cincinnati, OH Riverbend Music Ctr.
21 East Troy, WI Alpine Valley Music Ctr.
22 Nobelsville, IN Verizon Wireless Music Ctr.
24 Columbus, OH Polaris Amph.
25 Detroit, MI Detroit Energy Ctr.
28 Toronto, ONT. Molson Amph.
29 Montreal, QUE. Bell Center

July
1 Washington, DC Nissan Pav./Stone Ridge
2 Boston, MA Tweeter Ctr.
5 Philadelphia, PA Tweeter Ctr.
8 New York, NY Madison Square Garden
9 New York, NY Madison Square Garden

5 New York Shows, 4 Pennsylvania shows. That's so sweet. the only question....which to use my 10 club tickets on

2003-01-22T22:29:00.000-05:00

Today Jess rose an interesting point I heartily agree with, to the point that I must climb atop my little blogspot soapbox and preach. Mandatory organ donation is the way to go, it would save so many lives. To not be an organ donor is incredibly and needlessly wasteful. What could will your organs do you once deceased? Every year thousands of people die on waiting lists, withering away while that which could save them rots useless in a coffin. If viable organs were consistently harvested upon death, countless lives would be saved. And it's such a tiny expense. As I said, once dead your organs are of no use to you, and if they can be of use to others why not tap that invaluable source? How blackhearted can one be to deny someone life so their deceased brethren can just decay. It's stupid, superficial and selfish and people die due to this apathy. As you all know a week ago my friend died. It's a tragic situation, but she was an organ donor so at least her untimely passing will serve some good to someone. Death is rarely a happy occurence but if any good can come out of it, if lives can be saved, they should be. This all seems almost too obvious to mention, but there is a prevailing indifference to organ donation I find rather disturbing. And I think it should be a given that upon your death any usable organs should be taken and put to good use. I guess I can only hope this day comes

2003-01-18T20:23:00.000-05:00

Seether
Fine Again

It seems like every day’s the same
and I’m left to discover on my own
It seems like everything is gray
and there’s no color to behold
They say it’s over and I’m fine again, yeah
Try to stay sober feels like I’m dying here

And I am aware now of how
everything’s gonna be fine one day
Too late, I’m in hell I am prepared now,
seems everyone’s gonna be fine
One day too late, just as well

I feel the dream in me expire
and there’s no one left to blame it on
I hear you label me a liar
‘cause I can’t seem to get this through
You say it’s over, I can sigh again, yeah
Why try to stay sober when I’m dying here

And I am aware now of how
everything’s gonna be fine one day
Too late, I’m in hell
I am prepared now,
seems everyone’s gonna be fine
One day too late; just as well

And I’m not scared now.
I must assure you,
you’re never gonna get away
And I’m not scared now.
And I’m not scared now. No…

I am aware now of how
everything’s gonna be fine one day
Too late, I’m in hell
I am prepared now
seems everyone’s gonna be fine
One day too late, just as well
I am prepared now,
seems everything’s gonna be fine for me
For me; for myself.
For me, for me, for myself
For me, for me, for myself

2003-01-17T18:18:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was one of the most horrible days I've had in eons. Very tragic and infuriating. Nothing like someone you care about dying a totally wasteful death to brighten your week. I heard last night and I cried for hours, I managed to keep a lid on things during school and then I started crying on the bus on the way home. I am still crying. I know the old cliche about time healing stuff like this is true, but that won't make Nina any less dead. I wish so much this hadn't happened, to state the painfully obvious in rather lame terms.

2003-01-13T23:04:00.000-05:00

some political humor today...
Hu's on First
posted November 22, 2002 at 09:17 am PT
By James Sherman
(We take you now to the Oval Office.)

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?

Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.

George: Great. Lay it on me.

Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.

George: That's what I want to know.

Condi: That's what I'm telling you.

George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes.

George: I mean the fellow's name.

Condi: Hu.

George: The guy in China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The new leader of China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The Chinaman!

Condi: Hu is leading China.

George: Now whaddya' asking me for?

Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.

George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?

Condi: That's the man's name.

George: That's who's name?

Condi: Yes.

George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.

Condi: That's correct.

George: Then who is in China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir is in China?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Then who is?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.

Condi: Kofi?

George: No, thanks.

Condi: You want Kofi?

George: No.

Condi: You don't want Kofi.

George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi?

George: Milk! Will you please make the call?

Condi: And call who?

George: Who is the guy at the U.N?

Condi: Hu is the guy in China.

George: Will you stay out of China?!

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi.

George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.

(Condi picks up the phone.)

Condi: Rice, here.

George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?

2003-01-12T20:05:00.000-05:00

So it took two days for my website plan to fuck up. Today I logged in, ready to work and I found 8 of my emperor biographies gone. Totally vanished. I would estimate 3 1/2 hours work just obliterated. I was irked, to say the least. So tomorrow will find me re-doing that which I already sunk a decent amount of time into, isn't geocities marvelous? Thankfully, I was out at the movies a good portion of the day, so I wasn't given time to stew over it. I saw Far From Heaven, a very fine movie. I've been on this inexplicable streak of late when all the movies I have seen lately are actually good. It's quite something really. I am doing the typical Sunday night fretting, the old "good lord please don't make me go back to school tomorrow for 5 days" routine. There is a possibility that I will soon be receiving $20 for the ungodly amount of house labor I did yesterday and this morning, wish me luck on that. I should start my homework and I really might.....possibly. Maybe

2003-01-10T21:59:00.000-05:00

Just going to get a blog in before Iron Chef starts up. My first full week of school in some time has passed and I remain alive and lucid to tell of it. I suppose as school goes it could have been a lot worse. I mainly wanted to devote an entry to my ambitious new internet project. I am going to make a complete index of the emperors of Rome and Byzantine. There is an imperial index already in existence but it stops offering information around the reign of Irene in the year 800, another site stops at the time of Justinian. So I have decided to cover the whole thing--31 B.C. to 1453. A daunting task I realize, at the rate I set for myself of two emperors a day during the week and 5 a day on the weekends (and how likely am I to stick to that for long lol) it would take approximately 7 weeks. In reality I am estimating it will take still longer. So this will be a lengthy labor, and I probably will never get any hits. I did set up the main page, a recommended reading section, an about me section and did the first two emperors since I got the idea yesterday. I have no knowledge of html whatsoever so I am employing geocities. Visually speaking it's the drabbest thing you'll ever see but it's the text that matters. I will keep you posted as to my progress (because I am sure you're all terribly interested lol) and when I am finally done you can expect an extended period of blatant plugging, both here and elsewhere. I am looking forward to crafting this very much, lack of outside interest or ability aside. I would have pressed on tonight but my comp is running really slowly, I think I'm about due for a crash.

2003-01-06T19:52:00.000-05:00

The quote of the day, courtesy of Maleika is: "The world needs men who stick with Vaseline. Even Julius Caesar was a Vaseline candidate. How trite the world would be without Vaseline. If you think about it, there would have been no Roman Empire without the invention of Vaseline." I was going to explain it's origin but you know, I think I will just let it stand on it's own.

2003-01-06T17:31:00.000-05:00

In anthropology we have to research a unique culture and part of the perameters of the assignment we must research the costs of traveling to whatever exotic locale we have selected. My route to the tiny island nation Tikopia
fly from JFK in New York to Los Angeles CA
Flying from LA to Auckland New Zealand
Traveling by plane from Auckland to Honoari in the Solomon Islands
Taking a ferry to the Temotu Province
diving off said ferry and swimming to Tikopia
my island is so remote people who wish to visit it must dive off a boat and swim there. How I will theorectically do this with 30 days supplies remains to be seen (perhaps a small floaty raft or as jamie suggested, some noodles). It just struck me as amusing how difficult it will be to reach these people, I am assuming the Christian missionaries weren't made to jump through such hoops so I wonder why the change.

Various little points of interest
Over the course of the break continuing onto today I have gotten a postcard from Disneyland (thanks Karolina) from Sweden (thanks Jess) and a christmas card from Portugal (thanks Joao) it's made me feel all wordly and international even though I've never been any of these places. So thanks to all of you.

I got my research paper back today: B-. Trust me when I saw that B- was a gift from God, the paper I turned in was unfiltered crap. The fact that I managed to squeak by without failing is perhaps the best stroke of academic luck I've had in some time. Even the 78% I got on my take home math test was fine by me. We didn't get the tests themselves with the answer sheets, we just saw our grades. (Jess, I assume you'll be seeing this, I made several last minute adjustments concerning the answers I gave you and the teacher informed me without such extensive revision I would have gotten a 63 so I advise you totally disregard all I sent you and wait until I get the answer sheet back.)

The song of the day is Show me How to Live by Audioslave, whose album I have been enjoying immensely since I received it from Jamie for Christmas.

"Show Me How To Live"

In with the early dawn
moving right along
i couldn't buy an eye of sleep
and in the aching night
under satellite
i was not recieved
with the stolen parts
a telephone in my heart
someone get me a priest
to put my mind to bed
this ringing in my head
is this a cure is or is this a disease

nail in my hand
from my creator
you gave me life now
show me how to live
nail in my hand
from my creator
you gave me life now
show me how to live

in the afterbirth
on the quiet earth
let this things remind me
you thought you made a man
you better think again
before my role defines you

nail in my hand
from my creator
you gave me life now show me how to live
nail in my hand
from my creator
you gave me life now
show me how to live

and in your waiting hands
i will land
and roll out of my skin
and in your final hours i will stand
ready to begin
ready to begin
ready to begin
ready to begin

nail in my hand
from my creator
you gave me life now
show me how to live
nail in my hand
from my creator
you gave me life now
show me how to live
show me how to live
show me how to live
show me how to live
show me how to live

2003-01-01T00:42:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year faithful readers. I wish you all the best in 2003

2002-12-30T15:30:00.000-05:00

I have almost finished reading Patricia Cornwell's book on Jack the Ripper where she says she is certain the culprit was one Walter Sickert, some prestigious artist who died in 1942. She presents a good case except for one critical flaw: the killings stopped and he lived for another 40 years. Violent psychopaths don't just stop. It is obvious that Jack the Ripper was following the typical pattern of violent sexual fantasy culminating in an escalating pattern of violence. His victims mutilations escalate in brutality, and after a period of repression (assumed to be due to rigorous night patrols in East End) his attack of Mary Kelly was his most barbaric slaying. It all fits your classic sexual sadist/serial killer profile...but these people don't tend to abruptly stop. The author attempts to connect an 1896 killing to him and while I would not completely discount such a thing, the M.O. is significantly altered. Even if he killed this one case, how could he restrain himself for the decades he remained physically vital? It just doesn't make sense.

An interesting connection: Walter Sickert had a badly deformed penis that was eventually partially amputated after 3 surgeries failed to re-shape it properly. The man who performed his third surgery was named Sir Alfred Duff Cooper. His grandson was one John Julius Norwich, who authored the three volume history of Byzantine I got for Christmas in addition to A Short History of Byzantium I got my sophomore year and several other historical works. I just thought that was interesting. Small world isn't it?

My break is going well thus far, my only regret is I have yet to see the Two Towers (while other lucky stiffs have already seen it twice). I can feel the dread creeping in already about returning to school but I am trying to fight it back. Of course I have neglected all my schoolwork.

2002-12-25T13:40:00.000-05:00

well, it was certainly a flush day for me. The total....
a dress and two shirts
a piggybank that says "college fund" on it
a "Just Pugs" flip a day calendar
The following books....
Byzantium: The Early Centuries
Byzantium: The Apogee
Byzantium: The Decline and Fall
War Commentaries of Julius Caesar
The Chronicle of Crime
The Onion Presents Our Dumb Century
Portrait of A Killer: Jack the Ripper, Case Closed
Supreme Injustice: How the Court Hijacked the 2000 election
The Case Against Lawyers
two $25 gift certificates I used to get the following books
In Wake of the Plague: The Black Death and the World it made
House of Secrets (true crime book)
Gibbon's Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire
Delusion of Satan: The Full Story of the Salem Witch Trials

I don't think I've ever gotten so much stuff before, I am really spoiled rotten. Tons of snow on the forecast today, anywhere from 8-18 inches so I'll be staying in. Christmas dinner will be done soon and later I am baking cookies. The house is tranquil, tacky holiday music softly ringing in the background, general feeling of good cheer all around and I still have a lot of days off. gotta love the holidays.

2002-12-25T01:02:00.000-05:00

From the Pearl Jam messageboard
(To the tune of "If You're Happy and You know it clap your hands")

If you cannot find Osama, bomb Iraq.
If the markets are a drama, bomb Iraq.
If the terrorists are Saudi,
And your alibi is shoddy,
And your tastes remain quite gaudy,
Bomb Iraq.

If you never were elected, bomb Iraq.
If your mood is quite dejected, bomb Iraq.
If you think that SUVs,
Are the best thing since sliced cheese,
And your father you must please,
Bomb Iraq.

If the globe is quickly warming, bomb Iraq.
If the poor will soon be storming, bomb Iraq.
We assert that might makes right,
Burning oil is a delight,
For the empire we will fight,
Bomb Iraq.

If we have no allies with us, bomb Iraq.
If we think that someone's dissed us, bomb Iraq.
So to hell with the inspections,
Let's look tough for the elections,
Close your mind and take directions,
Bomb Iraq.

If corporate fraud is growin', bomb Iraq.
If your ties to it are showin', bomb Iraq.
If your politics are sleazy,
And hiding that ain’t easy,
And your manhood’s getting queasy,
Bomb Iraq.

Fall in line and follow orders, bomb Iraq.
For our might now knows no borders, bomb Iraq.
Disagree? We’ll call it treason,
It's the make war not love season,
Even if we have no reason,
Bomb Iraq.

Nicely capture's Bush's desperate desire for combat. It's past Midnight so Merry Christmas to you all.

2002-12-22T20:05:00.000-05:00

The quote of the day is
"The quail is the virgin, the duck the mature woman"
gotta love Iron Chef

2002-12-22T17:45:00.000-05:00

Spent hours at the mall today. My mom decided to put off the vast majority of her christmas shopping until now. So we wandered about for a long time, hitting Brentano's and Saturday Matinee and Hot Topic (they had the most adorable Strawberry Shortcake pajamas. I have decided I must collect Strawberry Shortcake paraphenalia even know I never watched the shows because the stuff is just so insanely cute). I was able to get two books with a gift certificate I had never used from last Christmas. I was disappointed that in the 20 minutes that elapsed since I first saw it they had sold the book about the Crusades I had my eye on but I did manage to pick up two cool things: Delusion of Satan: The Full Story of the Salem Witch Trials and House of Secrets, a true crime novel about an incestuous, murdering family. Between these two books, my book from the library That Godless Court? A History of Supreme Court Decisions on The Separation of Church and State and 4 different books I will eventually get through Amazon (3 volume history of Byzantine, The Early Centuries, The Apogee and The Decline and Fall plus Julius Caesar's Commentaries) I will be quite the busy bee. On Friday I hungrily devoured the book Ashley gave me about a man with 23 different personalities. What he lacked in style he certainly made up for in overall interest. As I look over this list I am terribly aware of what a geek I am.

I hope Jess is having a great time in Sweden.

2002-12-20T06:46:00.000-05:00

Got my SAT's back
800--Verbal
480--Math
lol
I will be going with the 800 and the 490, leaving me with a combined score of 1290. Not shabby and I am hoping the perfect score will turn some heads. I would have liked to hit 1300 but oh well

2002-12-11T19:23:00.000-05:00

We had a snow day today =). I thought I was dreaming when my clock radio delivered the news at 6 am, but I wasn't, and I got to miss school. Though no snow fell it was certainly a justified closing, everything was so slick it took me ten minutes to walk to my mailbox. I was sliding like mad, grabbing onto anything I could, desperate not to fall over and crack something. I am hoping we can even weasel a delay out of it tomorrow, because last time I checked it was coming down with a mad fury. I watched a movie today called Heavenly Creatures. It was made in 1994 or 95 and was the true life tale of two New Zealand teenagers who formed an unhealthy bond to each other, an obsessive friendship that eventually blossomed into a carnal relationship. The movie culminates in the two girls viciously bludgeoning to death the ones mother. And the weird thing? They only got 5 years in prison, being minors and all. There's some justice for you. The movie was well made, well acted and appropriately creepy.

P.S Last but certainly not least, a belated HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Shauna, who turned 18 yesterday. Shauna dear, I hope you had a great day.

2002-12-06T21:33:00.000-05:00

If they told you I'm mad, then they lied.
I'm odd, but it isn't compulsive.
I'm the triolet, bursting with pride;
If they told you I'm mad, then they lied.
No, it isn't obsessive. Now hide
All the spoons or I might get convulsive.
If they told you I'm mad then they lied.
I'm odd, but it isn't compulsive.

What Poetry Form Are You?

2002-12-05T19:32:00.000-05:00

It snowed like mad today. In the early morning all was quiet and snowless. But I guess sometime during first period it kicked up and proceeded to snow rather hard for the rest of the day. We were supposed to get out at 12 anyway, I guess that's why they called us in. In Psych in Lit Jessica Nolan was telling Nicole Angelilo that lots of schools, including the high school nearest to us Newton, had shut down for the day. During the last period, physics, they called a meeting of all student drivers (which of course drained the class of all but 3) and we were dismissed early, 11:45 instead of 12. It took my bus nearly an hour to take the 10-15 minute ride to my bus stop, we were really crawling. The roads were bad though, there was an accident I heard on the bus intercom and we were passed by an ambulance. I think because we had what ultimately proved to be an unnecessary snow day last Wednesday (I loved having the day off, it's just the weather wasn't really that bad) the administration was reluctant to close again, actual legitimate reason or not. I was hoping that the snow would surge on through the night, thereby giving me off tomorrow (and then I would have a 4 day weekend as we have off on Monday because of the start of hunting season) but all the weather reports said the snow would taper off and it would warm up. It did stop a few hours ago and of course I had to go outside and shovel. A tip: shoveling 5 inch deep snow in backless sneakers will only lead to badness and really stinging, red feet. I don't remember having a lot of homework tonight, just some trig that I will probably do during ER. It's official by the way, I am failing math. I got a 37 on my quiz today, thereby dropping my low D into solid F territory. Another shining example of my academic prowess. Well, this blog is boring me and I am writing it so that's all for now.

2002-12-02T21:12:00.000-05:00

The Mondag has entered the colon

2002-11-28T22:11:00.000-05:00

I have to marry an English street punk that looks like James Marsters

2002-11-28T20:06:00.000-05:00

And we are
Caught in the fire
The point of no return
So we will
Walk through the fire
And let it
Burn
Let it burn
Let it burn
Let it burn

2002-11-27T23:33:00.000-05:00

today was a desperately needed snow day =). And now I have a whole 4 days off to look forward to. I even did some college application work in the morning, how ambitious of me eh? There's going to be a Buffy marathon tomorrow, that will be cool. And I am actually cooking some of the thanksgiving meal, cross your fingers for me everyone. I hope my readers have a great break and a great Thanksgiving (and a great totally ordinary 4 days to any international visitors)

2002-11-26T16:00:00.000-05:00

I suck so much. I had my mock trial tryout today and I was unrelentingly, embarassingly atrocious. It started off passably but then I was shut down on my cross, as I attempted a line of questioning the defense was allowed against my witnesses but suddenly, when I got up, proved unacceptable. At that point I was mid-cross and half my case was gone. I improved some questions and filled the time, but I couldn't help feeling like I was delivering the worst performance of all time. I kept hoping someone would mercy kill me. And this whole lawyer thing is what I want to do with my life and I can't even pull off a decent school mock trial performance. So the question becomes what am I good for? At least I have my sterling academic record to fall on right? Oh yeah, I am been performing terribly well thus far. Between the 63 on my physics test, 62 on my trig quiz (god knows what I got on today's quiz, it was a total disaster, I was totally blank as to what do you, I bet every question was wrong, the test might as well have been written in Japanese) and to top it off today in English I got a 25 on my Becket reading quiz. Yes folks, a 25. And here's the kicker, I read the damn book. Read the whole thing, without omission and I got a 25. Jesus Christ, I am horrible at everything. I am left completely adrift, I am bombing all my classes, sucking at everything I attempt. I really need a snow day tomorrow, it's a possibility. The weather report said during 4th period that we could get 3-6 inches. How I would love that. But I know it won't happen, I know tomorrow I am going to have to drag myself out of bed and trudge off to school to fuck up all the more.

2002-11-25T20:27:00.000-05:00

I am so angry right now I could burst. I visited two sites today angrily condemning homosexuality. It was sick, these people were equating homosexuality with murder (before going on to say being gay is actually worse) and relishing the death of Matthew Shepard. If these are God's promised people, send me to hell. It turns my stomach to think of people with so much hatred in their hearts that they want people to die for their sexual orientation. Who does it hurt? What is wrong with consensual same sex relations? Nothing, it is not bad in the slightest but thanks to good old Leviticus you have the entire church condemning it. People have been murdered because of it, people have committed suicide in shame and that is the most horrible thing imaginable. Because it is nothing to be ashamed of but you'll never hear the church admit that. I find religion's only use being the preaching of blind, unjustified hatred. I can't even imagine how homophobia can be considered moral. I don't know how these people can sleep at night while holding such beliefs. How does one convince themself to hate so passionately for something totally undeserving of hatred? I imagine it comes down to a lot of brainwashing of impressionable children, but how can adults preach such vile views without shame? It makes me sad to think how much homophobia there is out there, and how it will never stop, because of the Bible. The bible condones gay bashing, and so it will never stop. But no, these drones abandon any sense of decency to just blindly follow the bible's every word. I just want to ask these people, do you believe people should be murdered for working on Sundays too? People taking from the bible and using it to excuse such disgusting hatred are bigots and nothing more, they are scum. I don't think either of the people who ran those sites are worth the dirt on the bottom of my shoes. They are sad, immoral, sickening people. Anyone who engages in their indefensible bias is a horrible person too. It is not ok to discriminate, bible be damned. I am scared I will not live to see the day when these people are put in their proper place, that their repulsive views will just be allowed to fester and destroy. There is sadness mixed in with the anger, sadness for how pathetic the bigots are, sadness for gay people that have to live in their world. I hate people.

2002-11-18T20:28:00.000-05:00

the song of the day is an unusual one for me considering it's not one I've ever been terribly fond of. But I actually, strangely, had a desire to hear it today. And the lyrics are really good. So, without further ado...
Black-Pearl Jam
sheets of empty canvas, untouched sheets of clay
were laid spread out before me as her body once did
all five horizons revolved around her soul
as the earth to the sun
now the air i tasted and breathed has taken a turn
and all i taught her was everything
i know she gave me all that she wore
and now my bitter hands shake beneath the clouds
of what was everything?
all the pictures had all been washed in black, tattooed everything...
i take a walk outside, i'm surrounded by some kids at play
i can feel their laughter, so why do i sear
and twisted thoughts that spin round my head
i'm spinning, oh, i'm spinning
how quick the sun can, drop away
and now my bitter hands cradle broken glass
of what was everything?
all the pictures had all been washed in black, tattooed everything...
all the love gone bad, turned my world to black
tattooed all i see, all that i am, all i'll ever be...
i know someday you'll have a beautiful life, i know you'll be a star
in somebody else's sky, but why
why, why can't it be, why can't it be mine?

2002-11-10T13:40:00.000-05:00

God, my computer is running so slowly. Take my advice, don't be greedy and start simultaneously downloading songs on Kazaa, only bad things can come of it. I spent some of the morning reading Dostoyevsky's The Brother's Karamazov, having to read Crime and Punishment over the summer in AP awakened in me quite a passion for the author, this is the fourth book of his I am reading. I am already dreading the return to school tomorrow after my four day break. It's not even the inevitable work I am opposed to at this point, it's that while I am at school I can't help but face all the things I should be doing. While at home, on vacation, I can exist in a hazy denial where I am not about to graduate, where I don'y have to pick my colleges and face the whole leaving high school, growing up thing. I guess I feel kind of adrift, as bad as my life now can sometimes be, part of me wants to freeze it because, hey, it could get worse. My mom is yelling at me to go up in the attic, so that is all.

2002-11-01T08:58:00.000-05:00

go here, it's the greatest thing in the world, you'll love it, I promise

;)

2002-10-28T21:34:00.000-05:00

My Pirate Name is Black Mary Kidd
take the test at: http://www.fidius.org/quiz/pirate.php

2002-10-28T13:23:00.000-05:00

today has been the greatest day =). I am in the computer lab, doing my business project about England, and I am in such a great mood. I got my resreach paper back in English, and I got an A-. An A, I got an A!!!!! So much toil and worry and stress, gone in an instant. I got an A!!! ::does cartwheels of joy:: I can't even express how scared I was and I am so glad it all worked out. My day is made. One last time....I got an A =)

2002-10-24T22:04:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow I am going to visit Allegheny College. It's about 8 hours away, in Pennsylvania. The college season is upon us, and I am really scared. There are obvious bonuses to the college experience, but there is a large part of me that is really frightened. College = adulthood and I am finding the whole situation rather daunting. As I was saying earlier, I just seem to be working for the privilege to work. I survive high school, go to college (the number of years would depend greatly on rather I go abroad to England or not) and then spend 40 years toiling away. I retire, live a few more years if I am lucky and die. I am just terrified that there will be no joy in my life as I get older, that I won't even have the small pockets of happiness available to me now. I am scared of applying to colleges and getting rejected, I am scared of not having enough money, I am scared of striking out on my own, leaving my friends and family behind. Yet mixed with this fear is my desire to leave the country. I assume these feelings are normal of any senior, but it doesn't make them any easier to deal with. I was totally fearless for a while, but I suppose at the moment comes hurtling closer I find myself alternating between such anticipation and panic. Tomorrow I will be getting my SAT scores, I hope I did well on them. Not only do I need to excel in them for my own sake, but all my super brainy friends performed awesomely, so I am going to feel so dumb if I am not up to par. We'll see tomorrow I guess

2002-10-22T22:46:00.000-04:00

I would never bother you
I would never promise to
I will never follow you
I will never bother you
Never say a word again
I will crawl away for good

I will move away from here
You won't be afraid or fear
No thought was put into this
I always knew it would come to this
Things have never been so swell
I have never felt this well

Paaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiinnnnn (3x)
You know you're right (3x)

I'm so warm and calm inside
I no longer have to hide
Let’s talk about someone else
Steaming, soon begins to melt
Nothing really bothers her
She just wants to love herself

I will move away from here
You wont be afraid or fear
No thought was put into this
I always knew to come to this
Things have never been so swell
I have never felt this well
Paaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiinnnnn (5x)
You know you're right (17x)
Paaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiinnnnn

You Know You're Right by Nirvana. Awesome song, I felt a need to post these lyrics today. On a Kurt Cobain related sidenote, that disgusting fame whore ex-wife/reason he killed himself Courtney Love sold his journals. Not that such a thing is above a woman like that, but it's still a pretty repugnant idea. I am really sad it happened, no one has any right to read that man's private journals. I don't he can't be embarassed being dead and all but it is still so wrong. The man obviously wanted some privacy and it's unfortunate he never got it. I hope everyone who reads it understands exactly what they are doing, and how wrong it is.

2002-10-20T22:42:00.000-04:00

The theme of the day is self improvement. I was thinking a little earlier today, what can I do to be a more enjoyable person to my intimates? What about my personality can I improve to better suit the people I care about? I give you, my loyal reading public, an opportunity to be a little interactive. We can play "fix Korey" You tell me what's wrong, I can alter it and be the best Korey I can be.

2002-10-18T20:47:00.000-04:00

I took this personality disorder test (http://www.4degreez.com/misc/personality_disorder_test.mv) from RavenBlog, I took it quite some time ago and decided to give it a go again, This is what I got:
Disorder Rating Information
Paranoid: Low
Schizoid: Low
Schizotypal: Moderate
Antisocial: Low
Borderline: High
Histrionic: High
Narcissistic: Low
Avoidant: Low
Dependent: Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive: moderate

This is what it says about the ones I scored highly on:
Borderline
Borderline personality disorder is characterized by mood instability and poor self-image. People with this disorder are prone to constant mood swings and bouts of anger. Often, they will take their anger out on themselves, causing themselves injury. Suicidal threats and actions are not uncommon. They think in very black and white terms and often form intense, conflict-ridden relationships. They are quick to anger when their expectations are not met.

Histrionic
People with histrionic personality disorder are constant attention seekers. They need to be the center of attention all the time, often interrupting others in order to dominate the conversation. They use grandiose language to discribe everyday events and seek constant praise. They may dress provacatively or exaggerate illnesses in order to gain attention. They also tend to exaggerate friendships and relationships, believing that everyone loves them. They are often manipulative.

just great huh?

2002-10-18T20:26:00.000-04:00

I am so glad this week is over. I only went to school for 4 days but the amount of work made it seem much longer. I had two papers, a physics project, and a research paper in my incredibly scary AP English class, in addition to nightly homework assignments. I really need some unwind time. I just caught an old Buffy I had never seen and I am going to lie back and read this interesting book I got from the library yesterday: Crime and Madness-The Origin and Evolution of the Insanity Defense. I'm about 70 pages in and it's very interesting. I am cool with some reading--as long as it isn't about Dylan Thomas. Good poet yes but I have had my fill of him for a bit. Right now I am on the verge of tears from this song I am listening to, this special performance of Pearl Jam's Corduroy. It's an acoustic rendition from 1996, the tempo is significantly altered and it sounds so slad played really slowly. Sometimes a good song will just hit you in a different way even though you've heard it a million times. Meanwhile I am going to see if I can try to switch templates, I've been having issues with Blogger for weeks. Every single time I try to post--"503 template error" Computer neanderthal that I am I don't know how to repair it, so I just repost and hope I'll get lucky. I am about to try my luck right now, I hope this actually shows up.

2002-10-14T19:31:00.000-04:00

Posting from my grandma's house. I did some research paper work (found a few sources) and I asked my mom if we could go to the library tomorrow. It's due on Friday and i have this precarious B I can't let go of, so it has to be great. Most difficult will be writing two poems in Dylan Thomas's style. There is a reason he is an acclaimed poet and I'm not. If anything sinks me it will be that. I procrastinated as usual, watched back to back Lifetime movies, the first of which pissed me off so much. It was called Promise A Miracle and was about this family who denied their diabetic son insulin in an attempt to heal him. Of course he died a protracted and painful death. His parents just stood by and let him die "because God would decide whether to save him or not." I think it was based on a true story, and when I think of this poor little boy who died due to his parents' gross stupidity, it makes me so angry. I know their is freedom of religion and all of that, but when your religion kills people it needs to be tempered. So I was burning with righteous indignation, left to stew over yet another negative side affect of organized religion. It's not the belief in God itself that bothers me, I am totally cool with people believing in a higher power. It's only when they take these beliefs and use them to excuse a manner of atrocities that I get mad. I guess it's never going to change, but it's still wrong.

2002-10-08T15:36:00.000-04:00

I found out the coolest thing today. Whilst reading my nedstat I (or more appropriately my friend Jess) noticed a hit from a site, a blog I had never heard of. I clicked on the link and I found myself at this girl Taylor's blog, linked under her daily intake section. And I was like, cool beans, I got linked by someone I didn't know. So I was glowing with accomplishment for a few shining seconds. So you'll notice I linked her on the side and I shall do so again right now, as I did above. Now the pressure is on, lol. My usual lackasadaical attitude isn't going to hack it when people are nice enough to link me. So yeah, i guess I am a really sad person if this thrills me but it does.

P.S. If anyone is reading this and they can let me know where I can find John Julius Norwich's 3 volume history of Byzantine comment and let me know, I am on the hunt. Yeah, I know, nobody reads this except a few choice people but it couldn't hurt to ask.

2002-10-06T17:35:00.000-04:00

I am 37.5% British, just like
Madonna
Just as happy in LA or London. Aren't the narrow roads in the UK quaint.

Take the Brit Quiz at
www.darrenlondon.tripod.com/britquiz1.htm
Quiz written by Daz

2002-10-05T21:13:00.000-04:00

I got a two pairs of nifty new pajamas today =) I love shopping for pajamas so much, the only kind of clothes shopping that doesn't bore and annoy me. I also have this habit of wearing my pajamas to school, something that doesn't please my parents too much but I just can't help myself. Not only are they super comfortable, but I think they are awesome looking too. I also just downloaded this awesome song, I Am Ready for Love by the Counting Crows. I am not a fan of the band as a whole, but I am totally enraptured with this one song. I heard it on Cruel Intentions earlier and was immediately struck by it. Thanks to Kazaa now I have it. Nothing much more to say, today was pretty low key. Just like I like my Saturdays. Tomorrow I have an ungodly amount of school work, that won't be too fun but at this moment I am pretty calm and content.

2002-10-04T21:00:00.000-04:00

The song of the day is:
Save You by Pearl Jam

i'm gonna save you fucker, not gonna lose you

i'm feeling cocky and strong, can't let you go

too important to me, and too important to us

we'd be lost without you

i'm there, let yourself fall, i'm right below you now

and fuck me if i say something you don't want to hear, from me

and fuck me if you only hear what you wanna hear, from me, if i care

but i'm not leaving here

you helped me when i was down, i'll help when you're down

why are you hitting yourself? c'mon and hit me instead

let's pick up your will, it's grown fat and lazy

it's sympathetic as well, don't go on me now

and i'm not living this life without you, i'm selfish and clear

and you're not leaving here without me, i don't wanna be without...

my best friend

wake up to see you could have it all

whoa!

cuz there is but you, and something within you

has taken control, let's beat it

get up, let's go

oh, you're in your own world, let's see the whole world!

let's pick up your soul

and fuck me if i say something you don't wanna hear from me (fuck me)

and fuck me if you only hear the tremble in your head

please help me to help you help yourself!

help me help yourself

help me, please want me to

please let me to, help you...

2002-10-03T22:10:00.000-04:00

My senior profile:

Korey Lynn Hughes

Nickname: Ko

Quotes: “Veni, vidi, vici,” Julius Caesar, “its like her thoughts are too big for her size/she's been taken... where, I don't know/off she goes with her perfectly unkept hope” Pearl Jam, “It was at that point that I lost all faith in humanity. Once I thought I found it under the couch, but it turned out to be a sandwich.”

Best Known For: hysterical laughter

Usually Seen With: Jess, Ashley, Jamie, Brittany, Laura, Jess

Future Ambition: go to college, become a lawyer and settle down with a great person

Greatest Accomplishment: surviving

Pet Peeves: republicans, rap, pop, ebonics, spiders, homophobia, getting up at 6 am, Guns N Roses, hunters, gun nuts, tuna fish smell, barking dogs, chick flicks

Weaknesses: Pearl Jam, british accents, sleeping in, oral presentations, Roman and Byzantinian history, Bed of Roses, black velvet, long, dark hair, chocolate, rainbow pants, soccer hooligans, Raskolnikov, flannel, Boy Meets Boy, Jess drawing

Always Will Remember: The Roman Amputee, People with Progeria, “I am not a candy cane,” the fear demon, 101 Dalmations theme, Mr. Loaf, Heather Donahue’s Hair, no I wouldn’t (rt jess) the hotel trip, staying after with Brittany, 9&11 grade art class, “where’s the stupid?”, French class, walking home, conspiracy theory and like a Flinstone, Adonis, All the birthday parties and sleepovers and other assorted excursions, the Canada trip, larch chestnut

Special thanks to: all my friends (I love you guys so much) and my family (who have been good to me even though I haven’t always been able to see it).

I leave….but will continue to live underneath the bleachers

Activities: Environmental Club, International Club, Tapestry, Kittatinny Chronicle

isn't that cool? =)

2002-10-02T21:43:00.000-04:00

edits

2002-10-02T21:42:00.000-04:00

I had a blogging moment a few days ago but then it was gone when my comp crashed about halfway. Then, lo and behold, a few days later, I have another blogging moment. This morning was interesting, I left school before class in order to retrieve some props for this French poem I had to memorize. Jess drove me home, I scooped up the necessary items and then I arrived in time to deliver my poem (Pour toi mon amour- for you my love) with minimal screwing up. Which is good, because I am thoroughly botching practically every class I'm in. My early math success has sank again to depressing near failure, I am considering scoring poorly in my AP English class. So my progress report is going to look just lovely. It's about 80 degrees deep into the night, I hate Indian summers. All my muscles are so unbearably tense, it started with just my shoulders but has spread to include my arms and legs. I would kill for a massage right now, I am one massive knot. So the feeling right now is and vaguely sticky. Until the new Law and Order comes on I am just going to sit here, read Boy Meets Boy, enjoy one of my Pearl Jam CD's, and mentally rally for another day of school. I really don't know what to blog that would be even the slightest bit interesting so I am going to cut it short now.
::hugs:: for Jess, she had a rough day today.

2002-09-21T14:16:00.000-04:00

www.somethingawful.com
What the Hell is a "Greasnin," Anyway?

Although I was originally planning on introducing myself and making a grand appearance on Sunday, Emily "Integral" Reigel has fallen sick to some alien microbe disease like "Martian Fever" or "Mooninite Mayhem." So thanks to Emily's pain and misery, you're all in Greasnin's house now! Take off your shoes, you're getting mud all over the carpet. I'm Ben "Greasnin" Platt, and I'm the new guy.

So how did I land a job writing for a website dedicated to bringing to light the worst aspects of our culture? What could have possibly traumatized me so much that I'd dedicate my valuable time, time that I could be using to think about breasts, to the Something Awful cause? How about this: I worked at a video store. For three years. You want trauma? I'll give you trauma! At the tender age of fifteen (I mean that in the nostalgic sense, not the perverted sense), I started working at a privately owned video store where the vast bulk of the business was generated by the disproportionally enormous porn section. We're talking thousands upon thousands of tapes, all hardcore.

Not pictured: a crazy badass punk.
I remember my first night of training when a guy came in to return a tape. It said "Zorro" in big letters on the front. "Hey," I said to myself. "I saw 'Zorro'! I don't remember the tape being bright red, but I also don't remember where I am or how I got here, so who am I to say for sure? All I know is, it's time for some employee-customer movie banter!" As I started to speak, I noticed a few other words in very small type, written right above "Zorro". Specifically, "The Erotic Adventures Of". Needless to say, I kept my crazy badass punk mouth closed. So that was Ben's Porn Adventure #1. Ben's Porn Adventure #2, later that night, involved a tape called "Ass, Gas, and the Mystical Glop". I'll repeat that: "Ass, Gas, and the Mystical Glop". And it all went downhill from there.

My store had eighty-seven volumes of "No Dicks Allowed". Believe me, I understand the appeal of lesbian action, but when Volume 86 and Volume 87 are filmed and released in the same week, the production value has to suffer somewhere.

Fact: if Robin Williams was in a movie, even if he was the key grip, that movie has been turned into a porno, with no exceptions. For example, "Snatch Adams", "Good Will Humping", "Good Morning Viet-Knockers", "Wet Dreams May Cum", and "Aladdinside of Me". As we all know, many other fine films and television programs have been turned into porn, as well. For instance, "High Infidelity", "Hairy Pot Her and the Sorcerer's Bone", "Saving Ryan's Privates", "Ally McFeel", and, of course, "The Gaytrix". Is your brain starting to trickle out your ears yet? No? Try this: people actually get paid to come up with these names. Possibly more than you. How about now?

It's always easy to tell the porno newbies from the veterans. Allow me to illustrate my point with this highly fictional conversation between myself and a porno newbie:

Me: "Okay, sir or ma'am. That's 'Operation: Dumbo Drop', 'Air Bud: World Pup', and 'Assgasms 26'. Would you like a bag for these?"

Porno Newbie: (Too quietly to be detected by scientific instruments) " ............. ............... ........... ........... ....... .............. ........... ...... yes."

As opposed to the Porno Veteran:

Me: "Okay, here's your copy of 'Men Can Lactate, Too'."

Porno Veteran: "You're goddamn right they can! I'd do it right now, but I don't know how! So I'll have to settle for watching this filthy porn about it and stroking my penis with my hand, because no woman would touch me! Hoo-ah! Now, gimme my smut! I wanna touch it! I love it - smut, that is! Thank you, Ben, for renting me this grotesque video, chock full o' smut! WOO HOO FOR PORN!"

That's not to imply that all porn renters are men. Many were androgynous. The point is, I could laugh right in the veterans' faces. I wasn't supposed to, but I could. They didn't care. They were just happy that "There's a Black Man in My Wife's Ass" was now available on DVD. All the same, I never laughed in a customer's face for a remarkable period of time. I mean, I'd been going strong for about two solid years, there. Then, a poor, misguided newbie brought up a copy of "I Can't Believe It's Nut Butter." I laughed him out of the store. I later found out he commited suicide. I can't say I felt too sorry for him though, because he probably wouldn't have paid his late fees, anyway.

This past summer, I worked far too many hours for my mental health because I was trying to build up some funds (read: hooker money) before going off to college. I spent an ungodly amount of time shelving tapes in the back room. At ten in the morning, that much porn is not pleasant. Let me dispel the illusion that people who appear in pornos, specifically on the boxes, are all attractive. That is a lie your parents told you to make you feel better about killing Jesus with your sinful ways. In actuality, only a small number of porn stars are even humanoid. The vast majority are nauseating deformed mole-people. I would not be at all surprised if the cast of "Feeders" went on to appear in porn. So here's the scene: it's about 10:30 in the morning. I have two hundred pornographic tapes to put back on the shelves, behind their respective boxes. I am quite literally surrounded by thousands of hideous mutants, all of them showing off their splotchy, malformed breasts full of enough silicone to drown a rhino (who would later go on to star in porn), flashing their gap-toothed smiles which were obviously disfigured in some sort of accident involving copious amounts of acid, hefting their mammoth flab just high enough to display their tick-infested genitalia. Just as it was all coming closer, closer, and closer, something caught my eye! Why, it's an attractive person (on a box, naturally. Attractive people don't actually come to a porn store)! This looked like it was high quality. I picked up the box and turned it over, to take a look at the blurb on the back:

"...chronicles the afterlife of a young pimp shot down in his prime. Given a second chance by the O.G. in the sky, Mac Daddy returns to Earth as an angel... destined to pimp worldly hoes for all of eternity. This is his story, biatch!"

"Biatch?" Moi? Well, I decided to let that slide and turned the box back over to get another look at the gorgeous, if made primarily out of plastic, women on the cover. That was when I noticed the tagline:

"Every Pimp Dies. Not Every Pimp Lives."

Wow. Really makes you think, huh? Next time you see a pimp, give him a hug. He'll stab you, but deep down, he'll know you care. Oh, wait, what's the title of this poignant masterpiece? Ah yes, "Pimped By an Angel 3". How lovel- wait! "Pimped By an Angel 3"? Goddamnit! They took the unsexiest show on television, right below "This Old House", and made it into porn! And what the hell is all this about "3"? You mean there are two more of these?

The reason I cry at night.
Yes, indeed, there are two more. I found "Pimped By an Angel 2" a couple of shelves lower. It featured the same guy who apparently plays "Mac Daddy" in "3", but in the second one he's not wearing his stylin' pimp hat while he shoves his penis up into a woman's intestinal tract. It was at that point that I lost all faith in humanity. Once I thought I found it under the couch, but it turned out to be a sandwich.

Naturally, my store has a large anal sex section. Anal sex videos, not services. Yes, we have anal, and yes, we have young people having horrible, horrible sex with old people. That's to be expected, because humanity generally sucks. That stuff rents with alarming frequency, and to basically every demographic. I got used to it fairly quickly, but nothing, and I mean nothing, could prepare me for the following event. A customer approached me to purchase a DVD, so I took the case from the customer, turned it over, and there it was: "Bust a Nut in Your Granny's Butt Vol. 8" Take a moment to catalogue everything that's wrong with that.

Done? No, you're not, unless you said, "everything." Allow me to show you what I mean:

1. It's anal. That's not the worst thing in the world, but it must be kept in mind.

2. It's relatively young men having anal sex with very. very old, very, very pockmarked women.

3. "Granny". That's right, it's incest.

4. Note the possessive pronoun, "your." You are supposed to fantasize that you are having anal sex with your own grandmother.

5. VOLUME FUCKING EIGHT!

6. IT'S ON DVD.

Guys, next time you masturbate (assuming you're not doing so already), I want you to imagine your penis being enveloped between your grandmother's ass cheeks. And I don't mean your cool grandmother, the one who showed you how to make a bong out of a potato. I'm talking about your sweet, kindly, grandmotherly grandmother. If you achieve orgasm, then you are a terrible human being and should die from the plague. Even if your penis refuses to become erect ever again, you'll want to punish yourself for thinking such thoughts about your grandmother. Go wash your eyes with fire.

I could go on, but, you know, my mom is going to want to read this. I'll bet she's so proud. So you see, while I may be young and inexperienced, I've had more than my fair share of scarring moments in my life. All I want to do is share them with you. Is that so wrong?

Yeah, I guess you're right. It is.

tell me this isn't the funniest thing you've ever read. I almost died when I saw it I was laughing so hard. Thanks to Chris for sending me the link

2002-08-28T23:46:00.000-04:00

I am back from a long day of activity. I woke up at an ungodly hour after about two and a half hours sleep, my family and I drove to New York only to turn around due to the inclement weather. We then returned home, I slept a spell and we drove to a movie theatre at least an hour and a half away to see Possession. All these family outings are an effort by my father to "recement our bond as a family" especially in the marital department. I doubt there is anyone reading this who doesn't know this but my parents have a tumultuous at best relationship marked with constant fighting and tension. I guess my dad wanted to see if there is the tiniest scrap of affection left. Today's verdict wasn't too bad, they didn't fight at all. I mean, there was the occasional catty comment or grumbled aside but no screaming blowouts. Considering how much time the three of us spent together I call that a victory. I should be reading King Lear, I have to turn in three reports when I start school in a week (vomit) but instead I think I will re-read Law School Confidential. I am at the present waiting for word from Manchester Metropolitan University as to what their requirements for overseas applicants are. Wish me luck, I hope I am good enough for them.

2002-08-25T22:57:00.000-04:00

I am kind of depressed at the moment and I don't know why. I don't know why you should care either so god knows why I am writing this. I should be making a home made card for my father right now, it's his 51st birthday tomorrow. I have a DVD for him I know he'll like but that's it, I don't have much money and the squeeze will just get tighter over time, September through December are incredibly packed months for me gifts-wise. I went out to the movies today, to see Simone, this slightly amusing tale starring Al Pacino about a down on his luck director who invents a cyber actress who later becomes incredibly famous and the demand to see her in the flesh drastically heightens. Wackiness ensues. We went to Barnes and Noble and I picked out some cool books (a book about serial killers, juvenile killers and an issue of Parenting, that sounds really strange I know) to buy later on this week with my birthday gift certificate. I think now the best recourse is to kick back with a Pearl Jam bootleg and my copy of Crime and Punishment.

2002-08-22T16:02:00.000-04:00

It's been quite a while eh? I went on a little vacation and then I got very lazy. I mean, I just couldn't summon the will to blog. I thought it was all pretty pointless, I mean, anyone who reads it already knows all that is going on in my life. But I have decided to return after a lengthy sabbatical. Why? Because Jess wouldn't stop nagging me, lol. Nothing much has been going on, I don't lead a very eventful life. It's all just wake up, watch tv, play on the computer, talk on the phone, dread going back to working, stuff like that. Something insanely cool did happen on Sunday, I got my very own computer. It's so cool, I am so excited! Thank god it's a PC, I hate Macs and that is what I have been stuck with until now. Best of all, I've been able to download music. Here is the playlist I've compiled so far;

Breakdown- Tantric
Master of War- Eddie Vedder
Big Dumb Sex- Soundgarden
Heart Shaped Box- Nirvana
I'll Be (Acoustic)- Edwin McCain
Outshined- Soundgarden
What's the Story Morning Glory (acoustic)- Oasis, Noel on vocals
Rape Me- Nirvana
Don't Go Away (acoustic)- Oasis, Noel on vocals
Rusty Cage- Soundgarden
You've Got to Hide Your Love Away- Eddie Vedder
Anarchy in the UK- Sex Pistols
Wonderwall (acoustic)- Oasis, Noel on vocals
Drawing Flies- Soundgarden
Vodoo- Godsmack
Stuff and Nonsense- Eddie Vedder with Neil Finn
I Don't Know Anything- Mad Season
Message in a Bottle- The Police
Overfloater- Soundgarden
Mind Riot- Soundgarden
Switch Opens- Soundgarden

I also can have Catz on this computer, an awesome computer game I couldn't have until now because it isn't Mac compatible. So overall it's been a sweet score. I am quite pleased. I just got back from Jess's house and that was cool. We watched some movies (Rocky Horror and American Beauty) enjoyed some Spongebob, played on the computer and generally had a good time of it.

2002-07-13T14:00:00.000-04:00

Today we're going to discuss why ticketmaster is nothing but a bunch of rotten, scum sucking bastards. I thought my computer was to blame for their site's inability to load: I was wrong. Three other people, all of them with high end computers, two of them with cable modems, couldn't load the damn thing either. The phone numbers they provided were all disconnected, how helpful. So we're left with a crappy malfunctioning site and a batch of bogus phone numbers. It's great those obscene service charges are going to such good use. After continually refreshing for an hour and a half and opening 3 browser windows the page finally loaded, after taking 16 minutes. I am still waiting, the order ticket page that timed out and failed to load 6 times, and each time I've had to endure a lenghty wait before the piece of crap finally failed. I've been calling in to check Damien's progress as well as that of my friends and relatives, they are all having the same problem. About 20 minutes ago we finally got the correct number from this music shop that works for ticketmaster, the owner said he has gotten over 100 calls complaining about the shitty service. None of this matters though, ticketmaster can provide horrible service and it doesn't matter, they'll still turn a profit. Because whatever they say to the contrary they are a monopoly and both bands and fans have no choice but to deal with them. So they can continue being a suckass company, they have no market competition and no one can stop them. No matter how much I loathe them, for both their godawful service and outrageous service charges, I will have to use them or never go to any concerts. The bands I want to see will have to use them or be unable to tour. So we have a horrible corporation that will always be horrible. And my mom just told me every ticket is gone, Springsteen is completely sold out. I am so fucking pissed off I could scream. If only their site hadn't been so, so very bad, if only they had actually provided a viable phone number, I could be the proud owner of a Springsteen ticket. But I'm not due to the rank incompetence of ticketmaster. Ain't life grand?

2002-07-11T18:25:00.000-04:00

You know what's really great? Sleeping for 12 hours. I went to sleep at 2 am last night, early for the summer and I slept until ten to 2 this afternoon, and I loved it. And do you know what sucks? The ticketmaster site. I go there to try to make an account so I can be ready for Springsteen tickets on saturday (I also went to his site to pre-order his album and enter to win tickets) and of course it doesn't load. I've been there before and I have always had problems but today was the first time it completely died. I just hope it works by Saturday otherwise I am going to be incredibly pissed. I do have a good mood cushion though because I am actually, finally getting a copy of hype. For months I've been to a bunch of different stores trying to track it down but my search has come to an end. This sweetheart on the Pearl Jam messageboard is going to send me a copy. These events make today slightly more noteworthy than your average lazy summer day.

2002-07-09T22:00:00.000-04:00

href="http://members.aol.com/groovydougie/quizzes/grunge.htm">Which Grunge Band Are You?

This should be of no surprise to anyone, but yeah, I picked the answers I knew would give me Pearl Jam as a response. Take the quiz if you want but it is really easy to tell what answers will give you what band.

2002-07-09T13:38:00.000-04:00

To use a Buffy analogy, I feel like the Zeppo in any situation. I hate how eveyone I know is smarter than me, nicer than me, funnier than me, prettier than me, how everyone I know is my superior in every way possible. I don't doubt the affection of my friends and stuff, I just question why it is there. I don't understand what I bring to the party, what I contribute. What makes my time desirable to others? How do I not annoy the crap out of everyone who comes into contact me? I am average to sub average in every possible category, and I hang out with all these awesome people. All my friends are terribly smart, and pretty, and funny, and sweet, and non-annoying. It's not that I am mediocre, that would be horrible enough, but I am below that even. I have no talent at anything and am distinguished only because of the things defective about me. I wish I could be someone else, anyone else, for a while. Or forever.

2002-07-08T22:47:00.000-04:00

I had a fun party today =). It was me, Jess, Jess, Sara, Jamie, Ashley, Brittany (sadly Laura couldn't come, she got in a fight with her mother last minute, I was surprised to learn Laura fights with her parents, they all seem so uniformly nice and perfect in her household). Still, much fun was had. We hung out at the beach near my house and didn't do much of anything...yet of course it was still great. We just talked and laughed a lot about tons of weird stuff. I got some awesome stuff from my friends: adorable red checkered flip flops and the Nirvana Unplugged from Jess, American Beauty and a cute teddy bear picture frame from Jamie, The Mummy and the Mummy Returns from Ashley, identical vanilla bath sets from Brittany and Jess, a bouncy ball from Sara. They all treat me so well don't they? I am now listening to the Nirvana Unplugged and I am totally in love with it, Kurt Cobain had one fucking awesome voice, he sounded so great live and acoustic. It's really sad Cobain killed himself years before I even really knew of the band, from what I have seen and heard of their performances they were such a powerful live band. Later tonight, after I catch Undressed (a crappy show I nonetheless have to watch every night) I am going to watch American Beauty. I really like Kevin Spacey, although I haven't caught his last few films. To be honest they don't look like movies that would please me but I might eventually check them out just because he is in them. I just hope he stays away from schmaltz in the future, I'd hate to see him squander his awesome talent. I am going to cut this random ranting short, I am probably being pretty boring, lol. Goodnight faithful reader(s).

2002-07-07T23:00:00.000-04:00

I went to the movies today, saw Men In Black II which had several individual scenes that were funny but lacked a strong overall structure, and then I came home and hung out on the net for a while. I kept nagging my mom to cook my birthday cake but eventually I got annoyed, told her to sod off and decided to go for it myself. I did mangage to bake the thing without setting anything on fire, later tonight I am going to go ice it. I'll tell you, it's hard to find vegetarian icing. A lot of brands actually have beef fat in them, isn't that nasty? But I finally procured a tasty and animal safe tub to use. I am itching for tomorrow to come quickly, I am having a birthday party with a bunch of friends. It's going to be Jess, Jess, Sara, Jamie, Ashley, Laura and Brittany and me hanging out at the beach all afternoon. Even better, today my parents agreed to the hotel plans! After dragging their feet for a while they okayed the plan, which means we can all get together, rent a hotel room and just hang out for 3 days. The 16th to the 18th, three days of uncut friendly bonding. It's going to rock, I am so excited =).

2002-07-06T19:20:00.000-04:00

As all of you who read this know today is my 17th birthday and it was a pretty good one. In the morning I had breakfast with a bunch of friends (Jamie, Ashley, Shauna, Jess, Jess, Sara) and ate the most adorable silver dollar pancakes, they were really darling. Then I dashed home to attend a family party my dad was throwing. I hung out with my cousin and what was cool was I actually talked to a bunch of my uncles and aunts. I usually feel painfully ostracized at family functions but today was different. I don't know what accounted for the change but it certainly pleased me. I then got $50 dollars of holiday money. Right after they left I got gifts from my parents. From them I got three Pearl Jam boots, the 1st Jones Beach, Virginia Beach, and St. Louis (notable for not featuring a performance of concert staple Corduroy), the Pearl Jam Touring Band 2000 DVD, and a DVD concert of the Doors, evil little me I can't wait to tell Jess and make Doors fan Sara jealous ;), a book about the supreme court and the buffy yearbook. A very good haul, I am pleased. I am now sitting here, enjoying some of my awesome new music (an emotional performance of Daughter that alone makes the Virginia boot worth purchase) and feeling pretty darn good.

2002-06-26T16:15:00.000-04:00

I love summer, I really appreciate wall to wall nothingness. Yes, i still have batches of chores to do but on the whole I love the freedom to sleep late, loaf around and basically become even more of a slug than I am during the school year.

2002-06-25T22:50:00.000-04:00

take the which pearl jam song are you? quiz, a product of the pearljammers community.

2002-06-09T21:43:00.000-04:00

I am blogging from my grandma's house, holed up in my aunt's room avoiding young children. Yes they may be my cousins but they are little kids nonetheless so I avoid them. I have been out all day today, I left fairly early in the morning to go to Stanhope day, this sort of party in the town square. There was food and amateur bands and booths to buy stuff, I got a massage and that was awesome. Then I went to the movies to see the Sum of All Fears, a failry generic action/suspence flick about Baltimore being hit with a nuke by a rogue billionaire neo-nazi. The movie was a total waste of some fine actors, Morgan Freeman and James Cromwell. But the highlight of the day was joining the Ten Club (the Pearl Jam fan club). My joining ensures me newsletters, discounted merchandise, a cool Christmas single (which I won't be able to listen to because I don't have a record player but that's ok) and two tickets next tour provided Ticketmaster doesn't act on their sadistic plot to severely limit fan club distribution. If they do suceed (and who could stop them?) Ten-club-come-latelys like myself will be screwed over.

2002-06-08T14:56:00.000-04:00

I have been majorly lazy about blogging of late. But let's be honest, what am I not lazy about? I do want to blog about something I did for the very first time yesterday: I drove. Just for a teensy bit but I drove nonetheless. First I backed up Jess's car and turned it out of the space. I did mess up a bit, I used my left foot to brake, and I took my hands off the steering wheel at one point but I didn't kill anyone so it's ok. Then I got behind the wheel again with Brittany in the parking lot across from the beach near my house. I turned the car around and drove up and down the parking lot 10-15 times. I'd drive down to the bottom of the lot, stop and drive up it in reverse, trying to keep in a straight line. I did alright, again no bodily injury or property damage, but I have to overcome this bad tendency to look at my feet instead of the road as I change pedals. Then I backed up some and parked the car. Jess has offered to take me driving perhaps using the parking lot at the Pit. It's about time, I have less than a month until I turn 17 and I haven't even gotten my permit yet.

2002-05-29T16:51:00.000-04:00

I am doing this survey using only Pearl Jam lyrics to answer

1. are you male or female?
young girl...violins...center of her own attention (Daughter)

2. describe yourself.
sometimes i know, sometimes i rise
sometimes i fall, sometimes i don't
sometimes i cringe, sometimes i live
sometimes i walk, sometimes i kneel
sometimes i speak of nothing at all (Sometimes)

3. how do others feel about you?
there's a girl on a ledge, who's got nowhere to turn
because all the love that she had was just wood that she burned
now her life is on fire, it's no one's concern (Breakerfall)

4. describe your boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse:
all alone, get the fuck away
all alone
all alone (All Alone, improv 3/13/94)

5. what would you rather be doing?
i'm so light i hold just one breath and go back to my nest
sleep with innocence (In My Tree)

6. describe where you live:
a spacious hole in the ground
somewhere nice (Push Me, Pull Me)

7. describe how you love:
love can keep on moving in both directions
how to be happy and true is the quest we're taking on together (Thin Air)

8. share a few words of wisdom:
you can spend your time alone, redigesting past regrets, oh
or you can come to terms and realize
you're the only one who can't forgive yourself, oh
makes much more sense to live in the present tense (Present Tense)

2002-05-29T14:41:00.000-04:00

I am blogging from school, Jamie, Jess and myself are staying after to do some work. Ms. Delatush gave us an assinine writing assignment about cheating. I guess she deduced the class had been cheating as a whole for our myth projects. It was totally justified. The despicable bitch assigned us twenty-six reports in 3 class periods. It was possible to churn out 3 per class, because each of the questions required some indepth explanation. So that's 9 that can be done in class and 17 that have to be done afterschool or during lunch. To ask such a thing is completely unreasonable yet completely expected of Ms. Delatush, the worst teacher I have ever had. So of course we copied off each other, there was no other choice really. There was simply not enough time for all that meaningless busy work. So my essay, in addition to most people's in the class, was a thinly veiled jab at the rancid beast of an English teacher and her completely unreasonable assignment. I want her to drop dead, I want her to choke to death on her tongue in front of me. I want to laugh as I see the life drain out of her. She is an absolute waste of space, not worth her weight in oxygen. Thank god I only have to tolerate 13 more days of her tyranny. I hunger to tell her off on the last day of school, to curse her out but I dare not for fear of her giving me a poor grade. That's all for now, if I continue this rant I could say some rather mean and twisted things.

2002-05-25T22:30:00.000-04:00

It sucks when it is hot late at night. Here I am, 10:30 at night and my house feels like a sauna. I tell you it just isn't right. I hate the gross, sticky, disgusting heat of summer. The thermostat should never go above 75 degrees. Despite the godawful heat I am currently enduring I am still fairly chipper. I had a really good day today. Saturdays are rarely bad and this one I enjoyed especially much. Right now I am reading Rolling Stone articles on Pearl Jam and laughing my ass off. They are so mean, it's pretty funny. Let's hope tomorrow is as good as today was, I may be going to the movies to see the new Star Wars but I'm not sure

2002-05-24T22:31:00.000-04:00

It's Friday night and I have a three day weekend ::happy dance:: It doesn't get much better than that...it won't for 15 day anyway (then I'll have my summer break). Just need to share my vacation joy, now I am off to have some dinner

2002-05-23T21:10:00.000-04:00

I should be working on my English presentation but I am not and I don't intend to. So what if I look like an idiot up there tomorrow. All I am thinking is 16 days left, 16 English periods until I am free. At least tomorrow is a Friday, and then I have a 3 day weekend (yay Memorial Day!) Tomorrow I have to get my senior picture taken ::grumbles:: I know it will look horrible, there is no avoiding that, and because it is a senior portrait the picture will be big. I couldn't ditch it if I wanted to. So I am resigned to looking like a deranged, thick headed cancer patient.

2002-05-21T15:55:00.000-04:00

Take this quiz or visit survey.JUNKIE for more surveys!

isn't that interesting? I am bi apparently.

2002-05-20T19:09:00.000-04:00

I got to go into school late today, missing English. How did I accomplish this? By lying to my father about when school started. He was going to give me a ride to school you see, because I had to cart in this massive project into school. So at approximately ten past seven I said "Shouldn't we go now?" And he was like "Why now? I say we leave at 8, doesn't school start at 8:30?" It starts at 7:30 so of course I lied to him and I didn't leave the house until almost an hour late. It was great. I didn't have to face the English teacher bitch of death Ms. Delatush. I can only hope she is choking on her tongue as I type. The project I turned into her was total crap but I don't care. I could fail every class I'm in and I couldn't care less. Complete apathy has set in. I just want to get out of school so badly eating a bullet seems a more appealing option then further study. I am just too lazy, that is what it boils down to. I have so little ambition I'm surprised breathing isn't too much work for me.

2002-05-18T13:57:00.000-04:00

I went to my junior prom last night. It was really fun. I got to get all gussied up (my hair required 56 bobby pins and half a bottle of hairspray, lol) and then me, Jamie, Ashley, Laura and Brittany went. It was held at Perona farms which was this really nice Spanish style dance hall type place. With a few heinous exceptions everyone was dressed really nice. It took me a few songs to loosen up but eventually I was getting down with my totally rhythmless self. I am so bad at one point I spun right into Ian Blanchard. Laura and her date Steve were so graceful. They both said they coudln't dance but they were majorly rocking the floor. All this music that I normally despise didn't bother me as we were dancing. Yeah, there was some akwardness during the slow numbers as I sat there in all my manlessness but it wasn't too bad. After the dance we all retired to Laura's house for some after prom fun. It was so funny, I finally removed all the bobby pins from my hair and it was still standing up from the force of the hairspray. It was cool to just sit and laugh (and gorge on cherry tomatoes) until really late at night. So the whole affair was very enjoyable and well worth the time and money devoted to it.

2002-05-14T21:12:00.000-04:00

I am two gratituous boobs

2002-05-14T16:42:00.000-04:00

I am on Hoth
I am a Circle K
I am a Capital K
I am John Dory
I am ready to mate again
I am a lemming
I am nature's farmer
I am a two pump chump
I am a dyke
I am a homosexual
I am a dirty heathen
I am the bowels of the B-Wing
I am Kool Aid
I am baseball
I am 3 plates
I am an Alaskan Swimmer
I am disposable garbage
I am Pearl Jam

2002-05-11T22:40:00.000-04:00

In other people's news, Jess and the Kittatinny team won the state envirothon competition again! They triumphed even as the Hopewell team cheated in a vain attempt to steal first place. Hopewell sucks so badly. They always come in second and they are so bitter about it, so they cheapen the entire competition with blatant cheating. Right there at the lunch table they are studying their packets (something they knew was completely forbidden). So rather than letting their perennial second place status inspire them to new levels of greatness they choose to degrade the whole concept of Envirothon through their heinous actions. Those scumbags aren't good enough for last place. And the worst part of it? The judges didn't disqualify or discipline these rank cheaters in any way. So they condoned cheating. So we have this group of lowlifes scrounging for victory and guess what....they still lost. How thick can they be? News of there loss brings me pleasure, that they weren't harshly reprimanded and thrown out of the competition angers me. I am angry for those who competed and lost to the cheaters and were never even told what the Hopewell team did. Oh well, at least the deserving team won 1st place(8 years out of 9). Congrats.
P.S. also discussing someone else, Chris has recently decided to become a vegetarian. I want to publicly applaud this decision of his.

2002-05-11T13:26:00.000-04:00

I walked my dogs earlier and my poor Mikayla got a tick. So it's my mother and I struggling to hold her still as she tried to writhe away. Poor thing didn't get that we were trying to help. Now I'm desperately trying to stall to avoid doing some chores. I haven't sat around doing nothing for long enough yet.

2002-05-09T21:20:00.000-04:00

Jess is creepy...very love struck but creepy

2002-05-08T18:52:00.000-04:00

Sound the trumpets, I have returned. First there was a week of illness, then there was three days of blog laziness. I missed 4 days of school and then just didn't feel like blogging. I mean, do I even write a particularly interesting blog? What do I write that is of relevence? Well, lucky for my lucky reader(s) I do have a rant in order. A Scott Stapp rant. Creed churned out a good first album, I'll give them that. My Own Prison is a fine CD. But subsequent releases have been crappy and Stapp's attitude gets evermore grating. Today I read a statement he made about MTV, talking about how much he was disgusted by them, and claiming Creed didn't use them to get famous. Bullshit. Now, hating MTV is a valid thing, but is insanely hypocritical coming from a frontman that used them so much. Creed has bent over backwards to use MTV and then to turn around and insult them...that's so lame. Obviously you had no problem with the channel when you were manipulating them to rake in millions of bucks Scott. I don't mind bitching as long as the band walks the walk as well as talking badly. It's ok for say, Pearl Jam to slam the channel because they have distanced themselves from it. They backed up their bitching with actual action. But if this is Scott Stapp's desperate attempt to score some credibility it is sad and painfully transparent.
Damn, that was long. I shouldn't care, really, Scott Stapp isn't worth a raving blog entry. The blatant hypocrisy really did bug me though. And it's better to focus of dissing him then on all the things I don't want to think about.
I am listening to this awesome CD I bought yesterday, Pearl Jam's Boise Boot. I scrimped and only paid $5 for prom shoes so I could buy it and I'm not disappointed with my investment. It's nice to know there is a good, contemporay band left. I actually heard from CD Now their new CD is done, I hope that's true.
Well, that's all for now/

2002-04-29T20:58:00.000-04:00

Today could've been worse for a Monday, sure I got no sleep at all last night but I think I have handled it well. I only really started dragging in Chemistry, I almost passed out mid-lab. What a sight that would have been, me sprawled out on the floor, acid eating a hole into the floor next to me. I'm not sure if Ashley and Jess would flee for help or stand and laugh. Oh well, today was a rather boring, non-descript day. Could've been better but could've been a lot worse. I might have to do my French quarterly tomorrow, I hope I don't freeze and forget everything.

2002-04-27T22:09:00.000-04:00

Today was a good day, evidenced by my imood (thanks Jess, as always she has installed my stuff for me). Saturdays are rarely bad though. The morning was unfortunately dominated by a nasty fight with my father over rainbow shoelaces. It is sad how such slight issues erupt into such angry disputes. But after that I wasted the day just as I'd like to, talking to some fine people and listening to some great music. Already though my thoughts are turning to Monday, how sad is that? It is Saturday night and even now I am fretting over school. I can't wait until I graduate, until I am free of the daily hell that is high school. Every school morning I lay in bed wishing I was dead. I love laying in bed for long periods of time, just sprawled out still relishing the feel of the minutes ticking by. I am really too lazy for my own good. Oh well, no more bad thoughts of school, there is still much weekend left to enjoy.

2002-04-26T22:59:00.000-04:00

It was only a matter of time. I went over two weeks without fighting with my family but that all had to come crashing down at some point. The trigger: my SAT registrations. My father failed to send out the letter and today was the due date. No big deal I said, I'll just register online. Apparently that was a big deal and before you know it my father and I are embroiled in a nasty quarrel. There was a frightening few moments as I was forced to rummage for my Social security number. My father blamed me for failing to mail the letter himself and made several derogatory remarks regarding my intelligence. Family is a beautiful thing isn't it? So the fight ends and I feel this insane urge to sob which I sort of manage to stifle. The fight was over vicious over something so inconsequential. I am sick of being these people, I want to go to college someplace far, far away.

2002-04-25T18:38:00.000-04:00

computer problems really suck. I had to get a whole new hard drive, $400 dollars down the drain. It really sucked. I got re-connected on Monday but I haven't posted until now, I've either been forgetting or been too lazy. I am mainly tired now, I haven't been sleeping well and I've been worked really hard at school. I got assigned this massive rash of projects and just as everything seemed to be slowing down I got hit with a big old English project today. Joy. I want to drop out and start working at a gas station until I turn 65. Then I want to drop dead.

2002-04-03T22:19:00.000-05:00

I am Vanilla Flavoured.

I am one of the most popular flavours in the world. Subtle and smooth, I go reasonably with anyone, and rarely do anything to offend. I can be expected to be blending in in society. What Flavour Are You?

2002-03-31T16:04:00.000-05:00

Hailing from sunny Transylvania, your first blood-related incident was when you stabbed a servant girl in the face with a pair of scissors for underperforming. Some of the red spray landed on your hands, and as you washed it off, you noticed that it left your skin fresh and young looking. From then on you were convinced that the blood of young girls was the secret to eternal youth.

Rather than killing girls outright by stabbing them or slitting their throats, you enjoy torturing them for weeks on end by pricking them with needles or prodding with sharp spikes - all to bathe in their blood. You've killed over six hundred women, all without raising a peep from the authorities.

If you wish, you can proudly tell the world that you bathe in virgin juice with the following fine graphic:

2002-03-30T19:06:00.000-05:00

Aw, cheer up little ducky. Why so glum?

Find your inner rubber ducky.

Find out which LifeSaver you are.

Today was fun. I was at Shauna's house, she was up from D.C. from 12 to about 5. We hung out, played a bunch of cards (and I kept getting my ass kicked) and when it was just Shauna and I we walked to this pond near her house and threw rocks and talked. It was a good day and I got to see Ashley and Jamie as well, too bad I left before Jess arrived. I tried motza, what Shauna has to eat all Passover, and it is pretty nasty. It tasted like cardboard with a slighty bitter aftertaste. It was another fine break day.

2002-03-29T21:30:00.000-05:00

nine things you wear daily:

1. bra & underwear

2. glasses

3.pajamas

4. claddah ring

5. friendship bracelet Jamie gave me

6. earrings

7. a shirt of some kind

8. bottoms of some sort (whether pants or skirts)

9. cubic zirconia ring

eight movies you'd watch over and over: (in no particular order)

1. Fight Club

2. The Professional

3. Gladiator

4. The Patriot

5. Jackie Brown

6. Shawshank Redemption

7. The Mummy

8. The Mummy Returns

seven albums that matter: (In no particular order)
ok I'm feeling lazy so...

1. Ten

2. Vs

3. Vitalogy

4.No Code

5. Yield

6. Live on 2 Legs

7. Binaural
(the above are all Pearl Jam)

six objects you touch every day:

1. keyboard

2. remote control

3. my pets

4. buttons on my CD player

5. hair brush/tooth brush/deodorant etc

6. writing utensils

five things you do every day:

1. listen to music

2. go on the computer

3. do chores

4. play with my dogs

5. Talk on the phone (if possible)

four bands/singers that you couldn't live without:

1. Pearl Jam

2. Bob Dylan

3. Incubus

4. R.E.M.

three of your favorite songs at this moment:

1. The Highway Man--Loreena McKennitt

2. You-Candlebox

3. Every Pearl Jam song except Oceans, Around the Bend, Black or Stupid Mop

two people that have influenced your life the most:

1. my friends

2. for better or worse my parents

one thing you could spend the rest of your life with:

1. My CD player with all my CDs

2002-03-29T18:30:00.000-05:00

take free enneagram test

2002-03-28T19:39:00.000-05:00

Today has been the greatest day, I am on cloud nine in a major way. I thought today would be kind of melancholy as it was the senior auction day and I would have to see Joel bought by someone else. But guess what? My friend Jess (wolfinger) and two of her friends bought him for me! Isn't that the greatest! This morning he pulls me aside, gives me a rose and I start laughing maniacally. I am just dying right there in the hallway. I made him walk me to all my classes and he serenaded my health class (with Brown Eyed Girl and I have blue eyes, lol) and dedicated the little number to me. We walked arm in arm to all my classes and I made him proclaim his love to me in front of an entire computer lab. Thank you so much Jess and Courtneys for making this purchase for me. I am indebt to you for the rest of my life. Thanks so very, very, very, very, much. It really made my day. It was so funny, the whole time I was just shaking with laughter. Afterwards Jamie, Jess, Ashley and I went out and that was great as well. We hung out in the Ames plaza, Ashley bought cute animal socks and we ate good pizza. It was so great and now I have ten, count em ten, days off. So much leisure time, I intend on getting about twelve hours of sleep tonight if I can manage it. I am so joyous right now I could burst. =) =)

2002-03-27T21:33:00.000-05:00

I have been typing all afternoon, my fingers ache from it. My father had some huge, very boring report that I needed to type up for him. I didn't like doing the work and the report was bad so I wasn't even typing something cool. Right now I am listening to one of my mix CDs and The Highway Man by Loreena McKennit is such a great song. Damien burned me two mixes last year but it had been just ages since I played them. Gripped by a sudden desire to hear some Clanaad I turned off my copy of Vs. (Pearl Jam) to play both mix CDs. It was good to rehear some of these songs, I reckon it had been about a year since I had last played these CDs. I assume tomorrow I will resume all Pearl Jam all the time but tonight is acting as a bit of a sonic cleansing, like eating a spoonful sherbert between courses. I have stopped making sense some time ago so I am going to cut this short.

2002-03-26T21:58:00.000-05:00

I should be working on my paper, it is almost ten o'clock and the thing is due tomorrow. But what am I doing? Playing on the internet, chatting and hanging out at the Synergy board. I am a bad, bad person. I don't even have a lot left, I am just feeling lazy. At 11:30 after my television shows are over (what great priorities I have, eh?) I will return to the essay. For now I am relishing my leisure time

2002-03-25T21:30:00.000-05:00

Take the What
animal best portrays your sexual appetite?? Quiz

my sexual appetite is that of a lion =).
Please direct youe eyes to the fansign below. My sweet little Jess made that for me and I love it so much. Isn't it great? Jess I love you, you are so great ::hugs::

2002-03-25T17:30:00.000-05:00

2002-03-25T16:32:00.000-05:00

*Take The Ice Cream Flavour Test!*

2002-03-25T16:19:00.000-05:00

2002-03-23T17:40:00.000-05:00

It has been a long time eh faithful reader(s)? Plagued with technical problems, as I perpetually am I have been unable to blog the whole week. Oh well, I guess the time passed uneventfully enough. Yesterday I went on my first ever Environmental club trip, (only took me 3 years) to dinner and to go to an Oceanography lecture. It was really great, the lectures were both interesting and I enjoyed myself heartily. I am a little irritable now, my mother has been driving me crazy today helping her decorate for Easter. Every five minutes "Korey, help me put this up, Korey, do this." She decorates too much, it is like an addiction. And if she must she could at least leave me out of it. The second thing that irks me, what my friend Jamie wrote in her blog. She was having a horrible day yesterday, she was beseiged with these horrible head pains and was in a rather poor mood. Alright, at this point I am feeling nothing but sympathy. Then she goes into this rant about atheism (as you all probably know I am an atheist.) The general tenor of her comments are that though she is surrounded by non-believers her faith remains strong. Then she concludes with "when you finally open your ignorant eyes and see all the things I have seen maybe you will understand." Well, thanks a goddam lot. Jamie, did I ever call you ignorant for being a Christian ever? no, I haven't. It is interesting that it is you the good pious Christian rather than I the evil, morally bankrupt atheist who is resorting to insults.

2002-03-16T22:04:00.000-05:00

I spent hours in my grubby attic today searching for Easter decorations. After I had wasted three and a half frustrating hours in that hole my mother calmy informs me that the items had been in the basement the whole time. Thanks. Thanks a lot. Our house still drowns in akward tension from last nights crazy blowout. My father at least provided me a ride to mail out a bunch of blank CDs (I'm in line to be receiving a bunch of Pearl Jam boots) and paid the postage, I guess that's the closest to an apology I'll get. My mother on the other hand remains steadfast in her unholy bitchiness. I have been isolated all day, I've been banned off the phone for my "outbursts" yesterday and my AIM has failed me, I keep getting a "your TCP/IP connection has terminated" error message. And my CD is skipping, driving me crazy mad. This means I have two defective CDs on my hands, the first disc of the Boston II show (at least only one show is damaged) and No Code. And because I have so much money to replace them....

2002-03-16T00:39:00.000-05:00

I don't remember the last time I have been so angry. I am seriously going to butcher my father, he is dead. I go to his car to search for an old issue of Premiere and what do I find behind a seat, my SAT registration. This letter was supposed to be sent out over a month ago and the SATs are tomorrow. The careless asshole never mailed my registration. The SATs are tomorrow. The prick even lied to me, saying we received papers back from the SAT people when obviously we did not. I have no idea what I am going to do now. I asked to pay the heinous late fee and show up on the testing day but my father vetoed that plan. So because of his lying, and his absent mindedness I can't take the test tomorrow. And yes, this is not the end of the assault. I entered my room steaming mad only to find the massive pile of cash I had been accumulating, months of savings, was gone. That was the money I had been hording to buy Joel at the senior auction. I wanted to purchase him so badly and I had like 150 dollars saved up. Now I have nothing, not one red penny. My mother and my father decided to steal my money in order to pay for damage to my mother's car caused when she rammed into another driver earlier this week. It's all gone, I am destitute now. So my parents sabotaged my SAT taking and ripped me off, isn't life grand. The resulting fight was so dramatic the house is still smoldering. I seriously want to kill the both of them in their sleep. How can they do this to me?! What have I done to deserve this? I was so concerned over my inability to take this vitally important test and my loss of so much hard earned money that after a thourough tongue lashing I just sat in my room and cried a lot. I hate everything.